Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
