JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
My ass is underappreciated
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
