Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
