North Korea, Best Korea!
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
