So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
