I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
