why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize