Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize