pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize