Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
