Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
