at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize