i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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