Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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