We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
