hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
