My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I know her cup size but not her name....
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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