Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
