just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
smell my finger.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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