How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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