I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
He better not be in your backpack
I didn't notice because vodka
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
