Having a random hookup so left but love u
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
