Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
