i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
