I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
