okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I think I sprained my soul last night
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
