Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize