That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
