I need help removing her.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
