turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I wish you could order shots online.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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