too bad you live with your parents still
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize