is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
