Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize