well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
id be glad to
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize