you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize