Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize