got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
