what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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