Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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