remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
