I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
