I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
