She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
