What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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