wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
They took my balls.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
