I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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