wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
