so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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