oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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