his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
