Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize